Showing posts with label bulgaria. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bulgaria. Show all posts

Saturday, April 5, 2014

a letter for beloved arny


9 December 2012 at 11:30
it's my belief, my faith.
my religion is my faith,
it's the thing that makes me still alive until now.
families and friends come and go.
even my own family hurt me.
I am alone now.
I am strong because I have only my faith and my God, and that's who I am.
my sister forbid me to see my mother.
you know, my mother that you know.
my mother forbid me from seeing my exs, that's why I'm alone now
I have no family, no friend, I am alone, left only my belief, my faith and my God.
you have different life.
you have your family and friends always be there for you.
I am not forcing my belief on you.
You are who you are and I am who I am.
I'm one package with my God and belief.
if you separate me from my God and belief, what do I have left?
You?
one thing that I learnt to be strong is that never relies hope on human.
coz human may disappoint me.
like you did long time ago.
how you hurt me, though I actually knew you were also struggling with your own feelings.
I forgive you.
I recover, because I believe in me, myself and my belief.
do you know how it feels when you don't have money,
when you can't eat for 3 days,
what left you can do is only pray?
that's what I do.
and where do you think all of those money and food come
although they come from different people, different friends, different family.
it's because I have only one faith.
and that faith is telling everybody to give what I need.
that faith and that belief is the God,
the universe itself.
that's why I respect IT(god/universe/whatever) by accepting the rules,
the moslem rules, doing good and not doing sins.
I am one package with my belief and religion,
take me or leave me, like you always do.
I love you always and forever,
but my love for you was not strong enough to keep me alive,
to make other people give me food or money.
can you guarantee? if I love you I will never be hungry or thirsty?
you can't didn't, you?
because you're not God and the universe itself.
If I marry you, I want it because of God,
which means you have to be moslem.
so that everything will be fine under God's will,
so that we can have good future together.
but then again, I don't have will over my own God,
so I can't guarantee anything for you that we'll have good life.
at least I've tried.
if you're not a moslem,
then let it be me loving you forever
without future together.

https://www.facebook.com/notes/vina-ariestharini/a-letter-for-beloved-arny/220811001386341

Friday, April 4, 2014

be certain, my lovely one...

25 March 2010 at 10:34
you don't need to ask,
who own this heart,
you knew the answer,
and you'll have it forever,
just make up your mind,
and be there..till the end....


https://www.facebook.com/notes/vina-ariestharini/be-certain-my-lovely-one/381155153871

white skin at morning scene

24 March 2010 at 06:54
is finally in a good mood
coz it's morning hood,
where she used 2 kiss white skin
above blue vein,
as white as lie,
as blue as morning sky,
where she used to hate the flow of teardrop,
the let go of cursing rope,
with creamy coffee
and slim tobacco blackie,
she'll be fine
just like wine...

https://www.facebook.com/notes/vina-ariestharini/white-skin-at-morning-scene/380818953871


will you be now... without me ?

20 April 2010 at 02:57
I answered u 2 accompany me through rough nights like this...
I'm doing my work, u watched tv
playing games, and watched dvd,
I'm here, u there...
sharing thoughts,
plotting crakiness,
above laughs and cries,
would be enough for me.
Why you have loved,
with stupidity I echoed,
Why u wanted us 2 be together,
bad time for me to be clever,
Why u wanted 2 make it happen,
follow ur games for being insane,
we've both smart and u knew it from the start,
still we're not smart enough,
to keep somethin we beautifully have,
I'm stupid one for letting u gone
what's the point in the end we're still being alone,
they said this only happen becoz we're lonely,
I swear I loved you for whatever you'll be,
I love what's in ur eyes and brain,
with ur warmth and kindness I could through any vain,
these words means nothing without you,
this love ain't good unless just me and you,
you said you were lonely,
will you be now... without me ?

- aprl 20th, 2010 2:53am : humble room with headache and wondering -


https://www.facebook.com/notes/vina-ariestharini/will-you-be-now-without-me-/388796848871

arny

14 November 2010 at 08:31
my sweet prince.. my big grins,
seeing your green eyes,
cute face like mice,
calm my restless of seeing those filthy girls,
who lick their own garbage,
that they had it damaged,
years ago with holy vow,
how this corrupt world amazed me,
and was so pure your intention can be...

https://www.facebook.com/notes/vina-ariestharini/arny/465783398871